美剧《心向快乐》第一季第一集Part1-中英文对照台词剧本

心向快乐
第一季 第一集
不过我不得不承认
Although, actually, I have to say,
这并不是你们不脱衣服就能享受到的最爽的事
I don"t think it"s the most fun you can have with your clothes on.
就是不脱衣服做爱而已
It"s fucking with your clothes on.
我诚意推荐 特别有趣 穿着燕尾服
I recommend it. It"s a lot of fun. Just, like, in a tuxedo.
把领结拉到一边
You know, pull your bowtie to the side.
把领带扯到后面 方便给别人口交
Like, rip the tie back so you can go down on someone.
真是完美的一天啊
It"s just like a really good day out.
你们喜欢吗 这家伙不喜欢
You guys like that? This guy doesn"t like it.
我今晚要讲新段子
I"m going to do new stuff tonight.
后面有群搞单身聚会的人
There"s a stag do in the back
每五分钟就大喊"屄"
that keeps shouting "Minge" every five minutes.
你速战速决
Just get on, get off,
快讲完快下台 明白吗
do what you"ve got to do, yeah?
感谢有你们这么棒的观众
You guys have been absolutely amazing.
-那女孩又来了 -我是杰克·巴里 晚安
- That girl is here again? - I"ve been Jack Barry. Goodnight!
感谢杰克·巴里的精彩演出
That was Jack Barry!
大家都还好吗 你好吗
How"s everyone feeling? You good?
准备好迎接下一场了吗
Are you ready for the next act?
太棒了
Yes, fantastic.
她是我的一个好朋友
Now, she"s a good friend of mine.
她最近成了我沙发床上的一个永久部件
She"s become a permanent fixture on my sofa bed recently,
但她一分钱房租都不付 她需要你们的支持
but she doesn"t pay any fucking rent, so she needs your support.
请掌声欢迎梅·马丁
Please give it up for Mae Martin!
谢了 兄弟
Thanks, man.
大家好
Hi, guys.
我是梅 大家童年幸福吗
I"m Mae. Did everyone have a good childhood?
我来自加拿大
I"m from Canada.
我最近划着皮划艇跟席琳·迪翁一起来的
I came over in a canoe recently with Celine Dion.
由她掌舵
She was at the helm.
我最近单身 有人单身吗 欢呼一下告诉我
I"m recently single. Is anybody single? Give me a cheer.
好 没关系的 我过得挺好的
Yeah. And it"s fine. I"m doing fine.
我在补一些读物
I"m...I"m catching up on my reading -
就是看我前任的脸书主页
just reading my ex"s Facebook page.
我看的就是那个而已
That"s all that I read.
我最近觉得很怪
I feel weird recently,
我也说不清 我唯一能给出的描述就是
and I don"t know, the only way I can describe it is like
自己好像是由好多只鸟组成的
I feel like I"m full of birds.
不是蜂鸟 像是我很焦虑
Not like hummingbirds, like I"m anxious,
而是鹈鹕
but, like, pelicans.
感觉像我胸口有好多油腻腻的鹈鹕
Like, very greasy pelicans in my chest.
我不知道你们见没见过一张照片
I don"t know if you"ve ever seen a photo after an oil spill,
漏油后海滩上
and the beach is just...
好多鸟身上沾满了石油
There"s all these birds and they"re covered in oil
翅膀举不起来 它们...
and they can"t lift their wings, and they"re like...
我胸口全是这种鸟
They"re in my chest.
谢谢唯一笑的这一位观众
Thank you, one person, for laughing.
你能不能告诉你朋友
Can you tell your friend
要是她再继续发消息
I"m going to flush her phone down the toilet
我就把她的手机冲下马桶
if she doesn"t stop texting?
抱歉
Sorry.
-你在给谁发消息 -我没发消息
- Who are you texting? - I"m not texting.
我在玩消消乐
I"m playing Candy Crush.
不 没关系的 完全没关系
No, that"s fine. That"s absolutely fine.
我必须保持谦卑 那么...
It"s very important that I stay humble, so...
是我妈雇你来的吗
Did my mother hire you?
屄
Minge!
-好好笑 -太好笑了
- See, that"s funny. - That"s really funny!
天 我太爱那个了
God, I loved that!
它让你思考 一切都取决于看法
It just makes you think, like, everything is perspective.
比如...
You know, like...like, OK,
我看着它会看见一品脱玻璃杯 对吧
I look at this and I see a pint glass, right?
但你可能会看见...几颗榛子
But you might see some...hazelnuts, OK?
我们都不知道你看见了榛子
And we wouldn"t even know.
话说 我跟你说过火腿的事吗
Hey, have I ever told you my story about ham?
-没有 -你会喜欢的
- No. - You"re going to love it.
等一下
Hold that thought.
-我去衣帽间拿一下饭盒 -好
- Just going to go get my Tupperware from the cloakroom. - OK.
乔吉 你为什么硬拽我们过来 我真讨厌喜剧
George, why did you drag us here? I literally hate comedy.
好尴尬
It"s so embarrassing.
那女孩对我太无礼了
That girl was so rude to me!
宾琪 她在台上讲的时候你全程玩手机
Binky, you were on your phone all the way through her set.
我知道 我太差劲了
I know! I"m so bad!
宾琪 你跟杰拉德说什么了
Binks, what did you tell Jarod?
我告诉他你喜欢他
Oh, I told him that you fancy him.
天啊 你为什么要那么说
Jesus! Why did you do that?!
因为你跟安德鲁分手后就再没找男朋友
Because you haven"t been with anyone since Andrew.
都五年了
That"s five years ago.
你下面的洞都要结蜘蛛网了
Your vagina is going to seal up.
大概这么大 里面装着卷心菜沙拉 没有吗
It"s about this big. It"s got coleslaw in it. No?
好了 我们走吧 车在外面等着了
Right, let"s go. The car is outside.
算了 我打算走回去
You know, actually, I think I"m going to walk.
真的 我要去厕所 你们先走吧
Yeah, and I"m going to go to the bathroom, too, so you guys go.
-去吧 -好 再见
- Yeah. - OK. Bye.
再见
Bye.
不
No.
能给我杯双份金汤力吗
Can I get double gin and tonic, please?
老天 刚才那场可真吃力
Oh, man, that was hard work.
-不过那女孩笑了 -什么
- That girl was laughing, though. - What?
-得了吧 -有什么不行的
- Nah, come on. - Why not?
你看见她了吗 简直是一朵英伦玫瑰
I mean, have you seen her? She"s like England"s rose.
而我就像一粒玉米粒
And I"m like a kernel of corn
还被别人黏在木棍上
that somebody glued onto some sticks.
她就像危险版的玛丽·波平斯
She"s like a dangerous Mary Poppins.
而我像辛普森一家的儿子
I"m like Bart Simpson.
-挺好笑 -我该怎么做 去找她聊聊吗
- That"s funny. - So, what should I do? Go talk to her or what?
当然
Yeah.
她来了差不多三次了 只觉得你的段子好笑
She"s been here, like, three times, only laughing at your stuff.
而你的段子明明很烂
And your stuff is bad.
-谢你了啊 -最坏能怎样呢
- Thank you! - What"s the worst that can happen?
-羞辱 孤寂 抑郁 后悔 -你好
- Humiliation, loneliness, depression...regret. - Hello?
-嗨 -嗨
- Hi. - Hi.
嗨
Hi.
嗨
Hi.
抱歉 你忙着呢 我...
Oh, sorry. You"re busy. I...
我就想来替我朋友道个歉
I just wanted to say sorry about my friend.
-不好意思 -没事 你...你叫什么来着
- So, sorry. - No. Fine. How...? How are...who are you?
-我是乔吉 -你好
- Uh, I"m George. - Hi.
你明白这个游戏的规则吗 那就好
Do you understand the rules of this game? OK.
-我想是的 -非常简单明了
- I think so, yeah. - It"s very straightforward. OK.
-你多大了 -29岁
- How old are you? - 29.
什么时候失身的
When did you lose your virginity?
就...昨天
Just...yesterday!
就昨天吗
Just yesterday!
最喜欢的电影
What"s your favourite film?
-《女狼俱乐部》 -《女狼俱乐部》 你骗我
- Coyote Ugly. - Coyote Ugly! That"s not true.
好了 该我问了
OK. OK. My turn.
你来英国多久了
How long have you been in England?
两年
Two years.
-你最喜欢的披头士乐队成员是谁 -布莱恩
- Who"s your favourite member of the Beatles. - Brian.
-我们在约会吗 -我不知道
- Are we on a date? - I...I don"t know.
-算吗 -我不知道 所以才问你
- Are we? - Well, I don"t know. That"s why I"m asking you.
我也不知道 你想约会吗
Well, I don"t know. Do you want to be on a date?
我们在争什么呢
Why are we fighting right now?
好了 我要回家了
Right. I"m going home.
你什么打算
What"s your plan?
我要再待一会儿
I"m going to stay out for a bit.
我用把沙发床打开吗
So shall I pull out the sofa bed, or...?
更多内容请百度搜索：可小果